Eva Longoria on her love for Victoria Beckham and the Real (and Desperate) Housewives (EXCLUSIVE)
As she returns to screens in Bollywood-inspired festive flick Christmas Karma, Desperate Housewives legend Eva Longoria cackles her way through She's Got Attitude
Eva Longoria, Desperate Housewives star, Hollywood glamour icon, and now Christmas movie queen, has jingled our bells on TV screens ever since Gabrielle Solis got into a brawl with a nun. Longoria now faces an Attitude camp-defining test, and yes, we are so serious when we say she brought every inch of unapologetic Housewives energy to She’s Got Attitude.
Give us the Christmas Karma elevator pitch…
It’s a modern take on a Christmas classic from Charles Dickens through the lens of [Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging] director Gurinder Chadha – a brilliant storyteller. Only she could have made this movie. The themes remain relevant today.
But can it beat The Muppet Christmas Carol? 4/5
Why will the gays love this movie?
[Cackles] Because Billy Porter’s in it! Boy George! It’s a musical! You know, any community that’s been marginalised will look at this as a rainbow of freshness. Myself, I’m the Ghost of Christmas Past, [who’s] Mexican. Billy’s the Ghost of Christmas Present and Boy George, Ghost of Christmas Future. Kunal [Nayyar] is at the centre of it all as a British-Indian businessman.
Might we add, it also features Hugh Bonneville, Danny Dyer, Pixie Lott and All Saints’ Shaznay Lewis? Merry Christmas! 5/5
What is your favourite Christmas film?
I love Miracle on 34th Street, I love The Holiday, I love Elf… I watch all of them every Christmas.
We only asked for one! Move over, Mariah Carey… 5/5
How many pairs of shoes do you own?
Three hundred? We recently moved and I did a big purge. I was proud of myself.
We feel like Gabrielle Solis would have more! 3/5
Who would play you in a film of your life?
Oh my God — me! [Cackles for a full five seconds] What would it be called? Dynamite.
We are obsessed with this laugh! 5/5
Who is the most famous gay man in your phonebook?
Literal pangs of jealousy. 5/5
And Billy and George’s, we’d imagine?
And Billy Porter’s! I didn’t get Boy George’s. I think he thought I was a stalker.
We can picture it! 4/5
You’ve created a girl group. Who’s in it?
Obviously, the Spice Girls. I’m Latina Spice. And Nicole Scherzinger because I loved the Pussycat Dolls. Who else…? Can Ricky be in it? [Cackles for seven seconds]
She Bangs! 5/5
Was Victoria Beckham always your favourite Spice Girl?
Always. I thought she was really, really fun. Sometimes, you look at K-Pop and go: ‘Oh, that’s a forced group of people who don’t know each other, pushed together to form a group.’ It looked like she really genuinely enjoyed those moments of her life. I went and saw her on the reunion tour [in 2007] — being back on a stage lit up her heart in a way you knew the first time meant something to her.
Maybe a full reunion is possible after all. 5/5
Do you have a favourite Real Housewives iteration or cast member, seeing as that franchise was inspired by Desperate Housewives?
I love Bethenny Frankel [from The Real Housewives of New York]. She’s not on it anymore, but oh my God, was she great. So truthful, funny and entertaining.
Reminder: Lisa Rinna has graced this page. 4/5
What is your go-to cure for a hangover?
Sleep. Let me tell you, it takes me days. And The Real Housewives! The movie I watch over and over again is Selena, the [film] from years ago with Jennifer Lopez. And any Sandra Bullock movie.
Nothing beats Desperate Housewives though. 3/5
Can you finish this one: “Do you know how bored I was today? I came this close to…”
…cleaning the house! That’s a great one. [Cackles]
We think of it every time we don the marigolds. 4/5
What are your favourite Gabrille Solis quotes?
I can’t say because I’d be cancelled! There’s always one on TikTok. I just posted: “I’m a pretty girl, and pretty girls are never lonely.”
Gaby to her daughter: “You with the head! You ruined me!” 4/5
Score: 86% Attitude
She counts Posh Spice and Ricky Martin as friends, sort of knows Boy George and made TV so iconic that Attitude staffers are still watching it 20 years later. Welcome to the British Christmas film canon, Eva! (Side note: we now can’t stop imagining this eight-piece pop band.)
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