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Trixie Mattel chooses between Ryan Reynolds, Timothée Chalamet and Ross Mathews in F***, Marry, Avoid

"I have absolutely no sexual interest in that"...

By Emily Maskell

Pictures: Bird Lambro and Jon Sams

Sitting down to play Fuck, Marry, Avoid with Attitude Trixie Mattel reveals, “I have absolutely no sexual interest in that” in regard to Call Me By Your Name star and internet heartthrob, Timothée Chalamet.

Obviously, that’s her pick for someone to avoid. Between Ryan Reynolds and Ross Mathews Tirixie picks the former to have a tryst with and the latter to settle down with. Why? You’ll have to read on

Speaking to Attitude prior to going on a worldwide tour with her best friend and UNHhhh co-presenter, Katya, Trixie said of her recent reality show, Trixie Motel“We kind of made a renovation comedy. The before-and-afters on the screen are jaw-dropping. No rhinestone was left unturned at the Trixie Motel, that’s for sure.”

Photo: Jon Sams

Do you get tired of being called Tracy Martel?

I don’t get tired of that. My fans have a familiarity with me that’s a little jarring. They’ll come up and be like, “Hi, you fat, bald f****t.” I’m like, “Hello, girl I don’t know.”

What do people say most often when they meet you?

They’re just excited. Everybody’s so nice. I look like, you know… I don’t know what I look like, but I don’t look good. They see a paper-white person with a bald head walk by. They think I’m Moby.

What would a film of your life be called and who would it star?

I really don’t know. Who’s that guy? Oh God, I don’t know anybody’s names. Who would play me, though? Somebody really ugly.

You’ve started a cult. What’s it about?

We watch television. We identify people who appear on screen without body makeup. We go to their houses, drag them out and set them on fire. And we teach the world that you need to put body makeup on!

What’s your favourite British food?

Those Aero chocolate bars. They’re so good. And a proper English breakfast is so delicious. I’m going to be controversial: I tried the vegan sausage roll from Greggs and I don’t think it was all that.

Which Disney princess are you?

I love Tangled. Mandy Moore put her whole p****y into that movie. She is so good. I guess, her.

What’s your biggest turn-on?

I love hairy men. There was a guy at the airport recently and his arm hair was so thick and dark, and I was like, ‘Fucking crush me with a truck.’ I love cologne, a hairy chest with a gold chain. Basically, if you look like Bruno from Popeye, I love you.

What’s your biggest turn-off?

Smoking — 100 per cent. Smoking, smoking, smoking, smoking!

Your favourite drag queen?

Amanda Lepore, Lady Bunny and Tammie Brown. I also have a very strong affinity for Jinkx [Monsoon] and BenDeLaCreme.

What’s the most accurate way to describe Katya?

She’s so charismatic. She just wants to laugh. If it’s funny, she’s on board.

Fuck, marry, avoid: Ryan Reynolds, Timothée Chalamet and Ross Mathews.

Fuck Ryan Reynolds; obviously, avoid Timothée Chalamet (I have absolutely no sexual interest in that); and marry Ross Mathews. He has a house in Palm Springs.

Photo: Bird Lambro

Trixie on… UNHhhhh

I never know what’s going to happen. Sometimes, we actually talk about real shit or, through comedy, actually address some real shit.

Other times, I wonder if we’re going to know what we’re talking about. And sometimes we don’t even talk about the topic.

Trixie on… Katya

I’m always trying to make a buck, and she is the flip side of the coin, where she doesn’t even want to get up and go to work for the job she agreed to do. I think we balance each other out.

I’ve seen her turn down huge-paying gigs, because she doesn’t want to do it. She’d rather stay in bed. Whereas if there’s a cheque attached, I have a really hard time saying no. She always reminds me: it’s just drag.

The Attitude September/October issue is out now.