YouTubers Dan Howell and Phil Lester confirm they’ve been in a relationship since 2009
In a new video released on their joint channel, the pair spoke openly about their personal lives together for the first time
By Callum Wells
YouTubers Dan Howell and Phil Lester have confirmed they have been in a relationship since 2009.
In a new video released on their joint channel, the pair spoke openly about their personal lives together for the first time. “We fell into it hard and fast in 2009,” Howell said. “It was so fast that we never labeled it. We just ended up living together and here we are!”
Lester continued: “We’re partners in everything. And no, it’s not always perfect. Don’t get into your head that we are the ideal of human partnerships.”
“We wanted the focus to be on what we were doing” – Dan Howell on their decision to keep things private
Howell reflected on how his closeted identity shaped their early years as a couple. “I felt we had to hide the relationship because I was still hiding who I was to my friends, family, myself,” he said. “A big reason why I’ve been like I never wanna talk about this is I wouldn’t handle people’s reactions.”
Lester said he was aware of the difficulty Howell faced in coming to terms with his sexuality. “I felt like I’d gone back in a mini closet in a way, which was weird,” he admitted. “I knew this was all very sensitive, uncomfortable and scary for you. So I kind of just wanted to give you time to figure out what you wanted to do.”
Both creators came out in June 2019 – Howell as gay and Lester as queer – but stopped short of confirming a romantic connection at the time. Howell said then: “Am I totally gay? No.”
They explained that part of their decision to stay private came from wanting to be known primarily as collaborators rather than as a couple. “It hits different,” Howell said. “Who’s to say there’s anything wrong with having the cute gay couple show? It’s just that we wanted the focus to be on what we were doing.”
“15 years of suppressing all of these stories and opinions and they’re finally gonna come out” – Phil Lester on the couple’s new podcast
Lester added: “Being funny, entertaining. Let’s be honest, there’s a lot of homophobia out there.”
Howell, who grew up in Berkshire, said the decision was also practical. “There’s a lot of straight guys that would simply have never watched us on YouTube because it made them uncomfortable,” he said.
Lester, from Lancashire, said they had no desire to turn their personal lives into a commercial product. “You are sharing your life and you are selling the perfect relationship on Instagram. Look at how we kiss. Look at how we vacation in Santorini,” Howell said, describing the pitfalls of couple content. “And then when your relationship inevitably goes wrong, not only do you have a personal problem, you’ve destroyed your entire professional life because congratulations everybody got invested in the storyline of your relationship. And when you f***ed it up, because God forbid you’re just living your life like a normal person, you’ve ruined their favourite TV show. How dare you destroy that for them!”
The pair – who first met through the YouTube community – have since built one of the most successful partnerships on the platform. Between them, they’ve hosted BBC Radio 1 shows, fronted Brit Awards livestreams, written two bestselling books and completed three joint tours.
They also revealed plans to launch a new project together: the Dan and Phil podcast. “15 years of suppressing all of these stories and opinions and they’re finally gonna come out,” Lester said.