Gareth Thomas: ‘I couldn’t be the person I wanted to be’

Gareth Thomas has opened up about his life before he came out as gay.

The retired rugby professional tried to take his own life on more than one occasion, after he came out to his ex-wife, Jemma, at the end of 2006.

Following the end of his marriage, Thomas went to his swimming pool with a bottle of vodka and bottle of pills, intending to drown himself.

Speaking about the end of his marriage, he told The Times: “I hid it for so long, because I was sure that some day my love for Jemma would be strong enough that I wouldn’t be the person I didn’t want to be, but the person Jemma wanted me to be.”

Thomas also recalled his first sexual experience with a man, which happened in Bridgend when he was working as a postman during his teenage years.

“Nothing needed to be said. It just happened. The nub of it was that I couldn’t suppress these feelings,” he said, adding that he was disgusted with himself, and felt the need to scrub himself clean afterwards.

However, since coming out publicly in 2009, Thomas has found love with boyfriend Ian Baum. Returning to him his hometown of Bridgend, he said he no longer feels ashamed of who he is.

“I don’t feel embarrassed saying it: I am a gay man who lives with another man, who is very happy and has settled down. I am finally able to be defined for who I am,” he concluded.

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