Tom Daley: ‘Coming out shouldn’t come with a big expectation to politicise everything you do’ (EXCLUSIVE)

Tom Daley has swapped diving boards for knitting needles… and this festive season, he’s adding a little extra sparkle to the Christmas jumper game.

The Olympic champion and knitting icon has teamed up with The National Lottery to launch the world’s first Scratchcard-igan – a limited-edition festive cardigan fans can actually scratch to reveal a prize. Only 100 of these knits are up for grabs, and just like the real thing, one in four hides a £500 win beneath its panels.

To be in with a chance, fans can follow @tnluk on Instagram and comment, “Merry Scratchmas,” on the pinned post between 10 and 30 November. Winners will unwrap their cardigans – and maybe even £500 – from 1 December.

But, while Tom’s latest project is full of festive fun, he’s also been using his platform to open up about more serious subjects.

In his chat with Attitude, the diver reflects on how knitting helps him stay grounded, why he wanted to speak publicly about his experience with bulimia and body dysmorphia, and how attitudes toward LGBTQ+ athletes have shifted since he came out at 19.

You’ve gone from Olympic diver to professional knitter. What made you want to turn a festive cardigan into a scratchcard-igan for The National Lottery?

It’s very tongue in cheek and it’s all a little bit of fun! I think the joy that I have with knitting is all about spreading joy and it’s about spreading fun, and I’ve had an amazing journey kind of learning to knit and doing all that stuff. So, when the idea of a scratchcard-igan came up, the whole pun situation of it was kind of fun, but it’s kind of just bringing a bit of festive spirit and showing the random things that you’re able to do with knitwear. The fun thing about the cardigans is that if you win a cardigan, there’s one in four of them actually you can scratch off and win 500 quid. So they’re actually legit scratch cards as well as cardigans, which is quite fun.

Knitting started off as something quite mindful for you. How do you continue to keep that as the purpose of it, now that it’s become such a big professional part of your life?

I mean, for me, it is still such a therapeutic thing for me to be able to just sit and knit, whether I’m actually making something to design something, or whether I’m making something because I want to, you know, I have a time pressure on it. I just love it. And I have multiple projects. I know lots of people with knitting, they like one project at a time. But for me, I like having multiple things going at once. I have one that might be an actual work knitting project, and then I’ll have one that I carry around with me, and it’s the one that I use to kind of switch off as well.

So, that’s the thing. If you’re a knitter, you never really see knitting as actual work. You see it as a chance to be able to sit down, have a moment to yourself, really be present, which I love.

You also knitted some hearts for Tracey Howe’s charity walk, who was honoured at our Pride Awards this year. How did it feel to be part of that effort?

Yeah. It was for Marie Curie, right? Well, I didn’t realise that she was actually interested in crochet at all. Someone from her team or someone who was working with her at the time reached out, and I think it might have been her partner actually reached out and just said, ‘Oh, she would love to have some kind of video message and if you could crochet a little something, that would be huge.’ And I just made these little hearts. I was like, ‘You know what? I’m gonna make a few and send them in the post and then send across the video.’ And I think anyone that’s supporting a charitable cause, I think it’s really important to highlight that as much as possible. And be able to, because people don’t have to do those things. People do those things because they want to raise awareness, they want to raise money. Anything that anybody can do is actually, even though often people think, ‘Oh, I’m not going to make a difference by donating this, I’m not going to make a difference by doing that,’ when actually all of those little things add up.

Earlier this year, you bravely opened up about your body dysmorphia and bulimia. What kind of messages of support have you received since?

I’ve received lots of messages of support. Lots of people being like, ‘What is he even talking about?’ And that’s the thing with body image and why it’s so difficult to talk about it as somebody that’s involved in sport. Because, as a sports person, you are seen as somebody that doesn’t have any issues with their body and they’re, like, totally fine and you’re off to the races, if you like. It’s like, ‘What are you talking about?’ But actually, that’s what creates a magnifying glass to the little discrepancies with your body and how it’s always seen as something that is either good at performing or it’s not good at performing. And how it looks. And you’re constantly being judged. Which is something… and especially in a sport like diving, when you’re pretty much half naked the whole time, there isn’t really anywhere to hide. So when I was growing up, like, 18, 19, like in the build up to the London 2012 Olympics, it was a very formative period for me. And I just… I really struggled with it. And it’s something that I then struggled with for years after that.

Now, as a retired athlete, I have to relearn what my body is now, because I’m not training four hours a day. But then I start doing different training, so I’m training to put on a little bit more muscle and it’s all very different. But I think someone that grows up in sport will know how that feels, and it’s something that you have to come to terms with. But I also think that now, for younger generations coming up, I hope people talk more about it, and it becomes a place for men to be able to air their concerns. Because at the time, I felt like I had to go through it very much alone because I was worried about bringing it up, because people would be like, ‘What are you talking about? You’re fine.’ But then actually, yes, I know rationally that I’m fine, and I look okay. I just don’t… but that’s the problem. You can’t get that little voice out of your head. And then you feel ridiculous for bringing it up. But at the same time, it’s my truth, if you like. So it’s hard not to talk about it that way.

Why was now the right time to talk about that?

I think because I’m not involved in the sport anymore, I feel like I can kind of let go of that chapter of my life. So it felt like I can now try and move on and figure out what the new me is like. My training isn’t about performing off a platform anymore, it’s about keeping up with my kids, staying healthy, staying fit, and being able to keep going for as long as I can.

You came out at 19. Over those 12 years, what’s your experience as a gay athlete been like? Have you noticed changes within the sporting world?

I think there are definitely changes, and it’s definitely being spoken about a lot more. I mean, I wished I had come out earlier, but at the same time, hindsight is a beautiful thing. I think now, more and more athletes are feeling comfortable about being themselves and being able to come out. But, at the same time, there are still so many sports where it isn’t as accepting, especially in team sports and in sports predominantly watched by straight men.

It’s complex, because coming out also comes with pressure to stick up and become an advocate or activist, and lots of people don’t want that responsibility. They just want to be themselves. I think what needs to happen is that if people choose to come out, there shouldn’t be this big expectation that they’re going to politicise everything they do. They should just be supported for being them. Their visibility and existence is enough of activism and advocacy without warranting extra commentary about what they should or shouldn’t be doing.

Do you have any advice for athletes who are struggling to come out?

Yeah. I’ve received messages on Instagram from people not knowing what to do, especially in countries where it’s against the law. The one thing I always suggest is to find somebody that you trust completely. For example, my best friend Sophie was the person I told first. Being able to share it with just one person can unburden you in a huge way. Come out when you’re ready. It’s not one simple rule for everyone. Everybody has to weigh up their own position rather than coming out because they feel they should. People who say, “You have to come out,” don’t understand that. Find that trusted person within your life and you’ll know when it’s the right time to speak up about yourself.

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Tom Daley has partnered with The National Lottery to launch the Scratchcard-igan, a limited-edition festive cardigan inspired by National Lottery Scratchcards which can be scratched to reveal a prize!

100 Scratchcard-igans are available to win via Tom Daley’s Instagram page.