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Danny (left)
Age: 29
Occupation: Senior PR manager
Ryan (right)
Age: 31
Occupation: Advert producer
What were you hoping to get out of the date?
Danny: I thought it’d be an interesting alternative to the usual dating apps.
Ryan: Another couple of dates was definitely the goal. Dating has become a long line of expensive dinners with strangers.
What were your first impressions?
D: Warm, confident and totally unfazed by the whole thing.
R: That he was attractive and seemed very comfortable. He also arrived before me, which was excellent because I hate people being late.
How different was he to your usual type?
D: He is a really sweet guy but my usual type is… well, if you rock up in a band tee, covered in tattoos and piercings, I’m smitten.
R: My usual type is somebody who is confident and not trying to play it too cool. He lived up to this. His being more than 6ft tall helped as well – sometimes I can feel like a bodyguard on a date with a little person.
Would you have swiped left or right?
D: Left.
R: Right. I’d even have super liked him if he had his height in the description!
How was the conversation and what did you talk about?
D: It flowed easily enough. We talked about films and TV, our careers, where we grew up, his globe-trotting.
R: We touched all the usual bases: work, holidays, London homes, ambitions.
What was his best quality?
D: He’s a real adventurer. He has pursued his dreams and happily takes risks.
R: His ability to make good conversation and stay upbeat.
Photography: Markus Bidaux
What was the most interesting thing about him?
D: His former career as a stand-up comedian.
R: That he models for life-drawing classes and is going to feature in an upcoming exhibition.
Were there any deal-breakers?
D: His love of football.
R: Our worlds are very different. He loves RuPaul, poetry and seems very cultured, whereas I was aware during my second mouthful of steak that Arsenal had just kicked off in their Europa League semi-final.
What do you think he thought of you?
D: That I swear a lot.
R: Hopefully, that we had a fun night together but I’d imagine he didn’t feel that special spark either.
What were you most worried he would notice about you?
D: That I drink a lot when I’m nervous. I also may have overdone it on the aftershave.
R: The cut on my lip where I was hit in the face with a football earlier in the week.
How was the food?
D: Incredible.
R: If you are looking for good meat, this is the place to go.
Danny and Ryan dined at M Restaurant, Victoria Street, London
Any awkward moments?
D: He talked about himself quite a bit. It felt as if I was interviewing him at times.
R: I didn’t know the name of a trans activist he mentioned. Then again, he didn’t know Aubameyang and Lacazette — we gay Gunners have a place in the world too!
What did you make of his dress sense?
D: Really casual. In his words: “I didn’t mean to dress like a baseball player.”
R: I was wearing a baseball cap and similarly styled jersey. My concern was looking like a baseball edition of a Guess Who character, but he was wearing a varsity jacket so we were on the same page.
How did the night end?
D: We grabbed a drink at a pub nearby because we had just started talking about politics. I love meeting a fellow socialist.
R: We parted ways, saying we would be in touch, both of us knowing that at no point did we exchange details.
What would you have changed about the night?
D: There was no connection and so it wasn’t really a date.
R: I’d definitely have got him to introduce himself, as still not knowing his name feels awkward.
Snog, marry, avoid?
D: Avoid.
R: Isn’t there a “get his name” category?
Will you meet again?
D: I’d say hello if we bumped into each other.
R: I wouldn’t forward plan it.
Rate the date!
Danny: 4/10
Ryan: 7/10
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