Words: Christian Guiltenane and Kieran Lancini, hosts of The Diminutive Collection podcast
Okay, so 2020 has been a bit of a sh*t show, but we can’t deny that it’s been sound-tracked spectacularly by a bevy of our bop-tastic banger-queens who brought the dancefloor into our homes just when we needed our discos most!
Attitude December issue cover star Dua Lipa was first out of the blocks with the sensational Future Nostalgia, a disco album that was as camp and catchy as it was cutting edge and cool.
Then Lady Gaga dropped Chromatica, a wild 90s-infused return to form that had the most flamboyant among us doing a backward crab.
Sophie Ellis Bextor hit the dancefloor, albeit a make-shift one she’d set up in her very own kitchen and gave the nation something to look forward to during lockdown, refreshing her career and leading to the release of wonderfully insane reworking of Alcazar’s iconic smash 'Cryin’ At The Discotheque', that came with a poignant empty venue video clip.
And now, the album we have all been waiting for has arrived. No, not Steps’ latest opus - though, let’s be honest, their steptacular singles 'What The Future Holds' and the strop pop genius of mad-as-a-hatter ABBA-esque epic 'Something In Your Eyes' promise that a veritable camp sensation is on its way
No, we’re talking, of course, about dear old auntie Kylie Min, the patron saint of perky pop. All year she’s been teasing us about her return to disco and has been generously dropping mouth-watering teasers like 'Say Something', 'Magic' and most recently 'I Love It', whipping us into a orgasmic frenzy.
Of course, the sassy pop sparkler’s never really turned her back on disco, not even when she eased on a pair of sequinned cowboy boots for her country-infused chart topper Golden.
One of her strongest – if not most satisfying – albums was 2000’s Light Years that featured amazing bangers 'Disco Down', 'So Now Goodbye', 'Light Years', 'Love Boat' and fan favourite 'Your Disco Needs You'.
But will her 2020 take on disco be as sensational as that near-perfect classic?
We asked Kieran Lancini and Christy G, the hosts of popular Kylie Minogue fan podcast The Diminutive Collection, to give us their first impressions of the album…
ChristyG: This is just such a fabulous tune. When I heard this premiered on Zoe Ball's Radio 2 show back in October I shed so many disco tears. It’s just joyous, so tuneful and so euphoric. Reminds me a little of her PWL days in the sense it's unpretentious pure pop and reminds me of 'Turn It Into Love' from her ‘hair hat’ days!
Kieran: This is the best of the singles from the album. This will become one of Kylie’s staple tracks. It’s very studio 54. It has a great groove and when I first heard I just couldn’t stop moving.
MISS A THING
ChristyG: Ooh, what a tune. This sounds a little bit like 'Magic', and I wish they had blended into each other. This is a luscious moody slice of disco that is cool, chilled and sexy and when you listen you’re transported to St Tropez where you’re sipping a cocktail while enjoying an illicit smooch.
Kieran: I wish this had started the album. It gives me Jamiroquai vibes. Very laid back disco - my foot was tapping away!
ChristyG: This also reminds me of Jessie Ware’s scrummy tune 'Spotlight'. Imagine if those gals had collabed!
Kieran: This is one of my favourites, I was I digging it from the start! I really like the Kylie claps in the chorus – that makes it feel real disco. Her vocals sound great. This could be a single. I just don’t like the vocal effect on the chorus, It’s a little too much. But the song is a banger.
ChristyG: I hate the word groove in songs, and didn’t like the intro. But then we get this '90s house piano and bouncy chorus that is as contagious as Covid. Great campy melody in the chorus – my only critique, I wish the production and melody was more fluid – it’s a bit jagged.
Kieran: After my first listen I loathed it, but it’s actually a grower. It starts off like 'Copacabana'. Its fun. The chorus is a hoot and could have been on Light Years.
ChristyG: Don’t be silly, this has no place on Light Years! I immediately hated this song. It’s noisy and a little forgettable. There’s too much going on and her voice is sooooo ridiculously whistle-high. But I must admit a few listens later the rhythm is getting under my skin. Not my favourite, but I am beginning to appreciate it. Come back to me in a week!
Kieran: The chorus is sensational. It’s very galactic disco. I like the vocals effects this time, I really wanted to dance.
ChristyG: Kylie has teased that this was going to be galactic disco, but I don’t agree. Light Years was very futuristic, but I think this album is actually quite nostalgic, retrospective and has a very authentic '70s soundscape. This has a great verse, and a sassy chorus that is one helluva grower.
ChristyG: This was an odd choice as a first tease of a disco album, but this is a tune that gets better with every listen. The euphoric psychedelic-light final two minutes of the track is possibly one of Kylie’s finest musical moments.
Kieran: In the context of the album, this sticks out like dog’s balls. It doesn’t fit in with the rest of the record.
Kieran: When I listened to this, I had ABBA vibes. Its very 'Voulez-Vous'. The chorus is sensational, while the verses leave me a bit cold - but this is is one of the album’s highlights.
ChristyG: When I heard there was an ABBA-esque track on here I was hoping for a yearning 'The Winner Takes It All'-type track. It’s not. It’s very sassy and I can imagine her stomping around in the video in heels throwing everyone shade. Growing to love it!
I LOVE IT
Kieran: This is a great song – but it was a growerl Now I am obsessed with it. It is very blueprint disco.
ChristyG: I was disappointed with this after 'Magic'. It felt generic. Then two days later I was trying to burn my man-boobs off exercising to it! It’s a corker. I love it.
WHERE DOES THE DJ GO?
Kieran: When I saw the title of this, I thought this was going to be her version of 'Last Night a DJ Saved My Life'. And then I heard it and I was like YASS!’ We’re on the dancefloor at 54. I love the build. I can’t wait for the remixes for this song.
ChristyG: This is the closest to 'Your Disco Needs You' on the album, it doesn’t sound like it, but it’s the most fun and has a campy chorus and chords that remind me of Anastacia song. If there’s one thing missing from this album it is humour. Light Years was done with a raised eyebrow and I was hoping we’d have a few more 'Love Boats'.
Kieran: This is an album track, it isn’t standing out as a favourite but I did like the speed increase at the end.
ChristyG: Is that because it got you to the end of the song faster? This is not a favourite. It’s a little tuneless and doesn’t have an explicit disco sound – it's more '80s pop-rock. The title suggests a sense of humour, but it’s actually a bit po-faced. Maybe with a video this could be a hoot. That said, after a couple more listens, I’m beginning to get a feel for it.
ChristyG: This sounds very disco but not in a joyous I Will Survive kinda way which this album is sorely missing. This has a funk disco, Chic-type vibe which isn’t my dancefloor bag. Too staccato in the chorus. And it doesn’t excite. This is a Kylie Min-No-No!
Kieran: This for me, I’m not loving it. It felt too similar to everything else. This could have been a B-side to 'Say Something'. There’s nothing new on this track.
Kieran: This is a fan favourite. When I first heard it was like track from Kylie Christmas. I am living for this song This is an anthem Its euphoric and has a great message I love it Its such a great song
ChristyG: This has got a great sing along melody – you can hear the tune straightway. SO epic and anthemic, this is a potential show closer for future tours – like 'I Believe In You', 'All The Lovers'. The message is so up-lifting, just what we need in these dark and crazy times, This is possibly most memorable and indeed best track on the album.
ChristyG: Disco is Kylie's most consistent album for years. This is a more grown-up version of Light Years and has its fair share of memorable moments. However, I wish there were a couple more arms-in-the-air anthems like 'I Will Survive', more of a kooky disco concept tying all the tracks together and a wee bit more humour. But as a whole it is a Disc-travaganza!
Kieran: I know this will be one of my favourite albums. I know I need to live with it a bit longer. I am excited for my relationship with this to blossom and grow because I now it well. I will end up loving this album more, even the songs I am not keen on at the moment.